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Past pain and trauma definitely impacted my ability to connect in certain aspects of relationships. Surprisingly, it caused me to accept pain and think it was normal to be treated a certain way by those you love and cherish. I also had to look at myself and what was causing certain triggers in my lashing out. Learning to heal and take accountability for my role in relationships has been a huge factor in creating a new norm. I think it was hard for me to learn the difference between what are considered healthy differences or issues in a relationship versus what are not and how to enforce new boundaries. I also began to pay attention to my responses and behavior to pain. Many times I tried to suppress it and push forward but now I try to embrace my honest feelings. If I am sad or hurt, I know that is okay. I have learned to honor my space and also try and hear differently. Choosing to reprogram myself has been a huge aspect of my path to healing. Open communication and being patient with the healing process has been important as well. Life can be so peaceful and rewarding as we learn to honor ourselves and those who share mutual value and respect for who we are. - Tierra Destiny Reid

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